The Randomest Story...

Ahem... here's a story:

I like pina coladas. Kevin the pigeon likes pina coladas. We went on a cruise. On the cruise we met Josiah who was wearing a shirt. Then a giant swarm of killer butterflies came and stung Kevin. Kevin the pigeon had a heart attack and Megan performed CPR then Josiah said "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" as he jumped over the side. Then Kimberley jumped over after him because she had superpowers and could fly. Kevin the pigeon woke up and said "Where's my pina colada?"
Isabella said "I drank your pina colada and I am now drunk enough not to know what happened to everyone else!"
Meanwhile, the killer butterflies were dragging Josiah underwater. So Kimberley jumped on the killer butterfly's back and had an epic fight with them. Meanwhile, Isabella passed out from her one pina colada and Megan was still trying to knock Kevin the pigeon out again because she liked doing CPR.
Kimberley won the fight with the killer butterflies and they were headed back to the island. She flew back to the boat with Josiah who was missing a vital part of his anatomy which was his left leg. When Megan saw him she fainted from the sight of blood.
So now Isabella, Megan and Kevin the pigeon are passed out on the deck, Josiah is missing his left leg and Kimberley can fly.